[ God... she's taking this so seriously. Good thing Maya isn't around to see how Momo deflates and then laughs, because her reaction is kind of endearing despite the fact that
you know
they're dealing with a medieval dick. ]
i can't let you fight alone! ( ´;ㅿ;`)
i'll be waiting at my place with the evil artifact
[ How dare you laugh at her, Momo, ancient dicks are no laughing matter!
... And god she really doesn't want to sally forth into battle with Momo at her side for... this. This stupid thing. God, why hadn't she properly examined everything before she'd grabbed stuff??
But here they are now, and she types a quick response - "On my way, you're too noble" - before she musters up her gall, her energy, and her inner strength and heads on out.
Whenever Momo answers her knock, he'll see Maya in Full Fledged Battle Readiness, that fire of determined destruction blazing in her eyes. ]
[ Ancient dicks are actually no laughing matter— especially when you have to be the one to wrap it up and carry it around. After he confirms that Maya is coming over, Momo finds a couple of cleaning rags to swaddle... the dildo in. It feels strange, treating a medieval sex toy like a precious package (ha ha... ha...), but he's all out of options at this point.
He meets Maya at the front door.
He can genuinely say that this is the first time he's ever met up with someone while cradling a dildo. Amazing. ]
Now or never!
[ Be delicate, Momose Sunohara. This is not the time to be A Total Dude about this.
He refrains from laughing, miraculously. ] Do you want to... do this in the back yard? [ where does one go to exorcise a dick ]
[ Thankfully, Maya is from a time before Mara was an aspect of one's soul.
Although maybe that might have prepared her better for this. Between flinging a chastity belt across a room at high velocity to prevent Jion from asking questions and-- this, Maya kind of wishes she'd succumbed to the curse a lot sooner so she could have slept through everything and not had to take responsibility for any of this.
But there's no changing the past, so she nods solemnly, looking for all the world that she's going in to fight the final boss. ]
[ God... it's good that they aren't dealing with Mara, tbh.
That said, the fact that neither of them really want to talk about the issue directly is leading to this whole "speaking-in-innuendos" business, which is probably making everything worse. Momo's enough of a gentleman that he's avoiding the use of the 'd' word (again, Maya is a lady!!! he's an idol!!! he's supposed to be family-friendly, to a point!!), but.
Is that truly for the best? Oh well. ]
Aah, yeah. Let's make it a quickie!
[ WORD CHOICE.... WORD CHOICE. He gestures for Maya to follow him out back, where he sets the bundled ''''toy'''' down onto the grass. ]
[ Not that she thinks the damned thing is going to attack them after they've both carried it around longer than they ever should have had to, but some of these spells are more widespread and the last thing Momo needs is to get hit by one. Even the fringes of one. ]
[ This feels like an episode of Jackass, really. Or maybe one of those Youtube videos where a bunch of teenagers try to set off 15 firecrackers at once. Either way, Momo can tell when something seems patently Unsafe, so he backs off without protest.
Pressing his palms against his ears, he braces his feet in the ground. ]
[ She's really tempted to just shoot it, but. That's a waste of bullets. So Maya settles for merely flinging every offensive spell in her arsenal at it instead.
It starts with a Bufudyne, a large, pillar of ice enclosing the Thing before exploding. Almost immediately, what looks like a localized ice storm sweeps around it, followed by the sharp crackle and blinding light of an Almighty attack.
And just to make sure that it's entirely vaporized, Maya casts Crescent Mirror once more, leaving a pile of light gray ash once that light clears. ]
... There.
[ It's said with an air of quiet, vindictive triumph-- right before Maya wobbles with a wince, because maybe casting several heavy-hitting spells in a row wasn't... wise.
[ Oof, that was... brutal? It was exactly as brutal as it needed to be, probably. The evil object disappears into a fine fog, one that gets swept up in an errant breeze and carried into who-knows-where. Momo doesn't really care to find out.
It's when Maya wobbles that Momo lunges forward, reaching out with one arm to steady her. He remembers how she had a hard time even walking after using her powers in the ice castle; chancing any more injury after the dildo insult isn't ideal. ]
—You did it! 500 experience points for you, Maya-neesama.
[ A laugh, and he grins. ]
How does it feel to know you saved an idol's life not once, but twice?
[ It's fine, merely that stamina thing she'd explained to him. But the support is helpful as she works on catching her breath, and Maya finally stops looking like the fate of the world is at stake and musters a smile in response. ]
Well, one of those times was my fault. But I'm really glad you'll be able to keep on singing.
[ Farewell, demon dildo. Momo tucks a piece of Maya's hair behind one ear, and eases into a relieved smile once she gives one to him for a job well done. ]
No way. You saved my life, even with that evil artifact! [ He would've been cursed forever without it!!! Which is a funny thought, but he won't bring up the medieval dick for longer than necessary... ] I should throw a private concert for you, as compensation!
[ Momo sure is affectionate, isn't he... to Maya, that's really just what makes him Momo, so she doesn't even mind at all, taking a quick breath as she leans into his palm for just a second-- and then straightens. Her eyes are bright. ]
Now that's just unfair to your fans. You know I wouldn't be able to turn down a private concert!
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you know
they're dealing with a medieval dick. ]
i can't let you fight alone! ( ´;ㅿ;`)
i'll be waiting at my place with the evil artifact
we can conquer this together! just you and me
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... And god she really doesn't want to sally forth into battle with Momo at her side for... this. This stupid thing. God, why hadn't she properly examined everything before she'd grabbed stuff??
But here they are now, and she types a quick response - "On my way, you're too noble" - before she musters up her gall, her energy, and her inner strength and heads on out.
Whenever Momo answers her knock, he'll see Maya in Full Fledged Battle Readiness, that fire of determined destruction blazing in her eyes. ]
Are you ready?
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He meets Maya at the front door.
He can genuinely say that this is the first time he's ever met up with someone while cradling a dildo. Amazing. ]
Now or never!
[ Be delicate, Momose Sunohara. This is not the time to be A Total Dude about this.
He refrains from laughing, miraculously. ] Do you want to... do this in the back yard? [ where does one go to exorcise a dick ]
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Although maybe that might have prepared her better for this. Between flinging a chastity belt across a room at high velocity to prevent Jion from asking questions and-- this, Maya kind of wishes she'd succumbed to the curse a lot sooner so she could have slept through everything and not had to take responsibility for any of this.
But there's no changing the past, so she nods solemnly, looking for all the world that she's going in to fight the final boss. ]
Let's do it. As quickly as possible.
[ Better word choice could have been nice. ]
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That said, the fact that neither of them really want to talk about the issue directly is leading to this whole "speaking-in-innuendos" business, which is probably making everything worse. Momo's enough of a gentleman that he's avoiding the use of the 'd' word (again, Maya is a lady!!! he's an idol!!! he's supposed to be family-friendly, to a point!!), but.
Is that truly for the best? Oh well. ]
Aah, yeah. Let's make it a quickie!
[ WORD CHOICE.... WORD CHOICE. He gestures for Maya to follow him out back, where he sets the bundled ''''toy'''' down onto the grass. ]
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... Okay. Step back a little.
[ Not that she thinks the damned thing is going to attack them after they've both carried it around longer than they ever should have had to, but some of these spells are more widespread and the last thing Momo needs is to get hit by one. Even the fringes of one. ]
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Pressing his palms against his ears, he braces his feet in the ground. ]
Okay...! Ready...!
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It starts with a Bufudyne, a large, pillar of ice enclosing the Thing before exploding. Almost immediately, what looks like a localized ice storm sweeps around it, followed by the sharp crackle and blinding light of an Almighty attack.
And just to make sure that it's entirely vaporized, Maya casts Crescent Mirror once more, leaving a pile of light gray ash once that light clears. ]
... There.
[ It's said with an air of quiet, vindictive triumph-- right before Maya wobbles with a wince, because maybe casting several heavy-hitting spells in a row wasn't... wise.
But totally worth it. ]
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It's when Maya wobbles that Momo lunges forward, reaching out with one arm to steady her. He remembers how she had a hard time even walking after using her powers in the ice castle; chancing any more injury after the dildo insult isn't ideal. ]
—You did it! 500 experience points for you, Maya-neesama.
[ A laugh, and he grins. ]
How does it feel to know you saved an idol's life not once, but twice?
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Well, one of those times was my fault. But I'm really glad you'll be able to keep on singing.
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No way. You saved my life, even with that evil artifact! [ He would've been cursed forever without it!!! Which is a funny thought, but he won't bring up the medieval dick for longer than necessary... ] I should throw a private concert for you, as compensation!
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Now that's just unfair to your fans. You know I wouldn't be able to turn down a private concert!
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[ A wink, equal measures playful and conspiratorial. Momo is everyone's Momo, but he can occasionally moonlight as Momose Sunohara, maybe. ]
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[ It's like she was never hellbent on breaking a dildo in half. ]